It's Been Slow

Before I get into anything else, here's a picture of my neck in its present condition. It looks good, the doctor says the scar shouldn't show too much. Now, it actually hurt a bit to tilt my neck back like this, but the scar wouldn't be visible if I didn't get a little light on it, and I did this to show all of you.

Even the bit with the tongue.

Ignore everything but the scar

 



It's uniquely possible I'm beginning to go slightly stir crazy. This isn't on account of anyone else or some kind of lacking entertainment options available to me. I just haven't been outside much lately because I'm not allowed to do anything. I want to clarify something here: my doctor and I have a tenuous relationship at this point. Examples include the following.

One call:

Kid: "Hello doctor. I had a tattoo appointment planned before your surgery, can I make that still?"

Doctor: "No."

Another call: 

Kid: "Hello doctor."

Doctor: "How are you doing on your medications?"

Kid: "I still use them...why, should I stop?"
Doctor: "Well eventually we want to have you manage your pain without them."

Kid: "Can I go swimming?"

Doctor: "No."

Kid: "Then I'm taking the drugs still. My shoulders are tighter than a prom date, I've been responsible with them and all, but if I can't do anything to relieve this tightness, then fuck no I'm not decreasing my dosage yet."

(I really did say "fuck no" to my doctor. She loves me.)

Another call:

Kid: "So I take it yoga is a bad idea?"

Another call:

Kid: "Hypothetically, I could start driving right now, so long as I don't turn my neck, right?"

Another call:

Kid: "So I can drink sodas, huh?"

Doctor: "Yes, if you take nothing else from today, it's that you can drink Coke."

(Actually, this conversation happened in her office, but it fit better here, roll with it.)
 

I've been reading some, and I've been playing videogames. The sad thing is, as it is all I've done lately, I'm kind of bored of doing both. I mean, how is it enjoyable anymore when I equip my Hands of God and sneak up on all those undead soldiers before backstabbing them? (Which is basically me smashing these huge gauntlets into their brittle spines.) It's like I'm living vicariously through this active videogame character who can, you know, move his neck; but see...it isn't really exciting anymore.

I've taken up talking to myself. I tried writing some -- you know, all the fiction most everyone I know has been waiting for me to get back to or actually apply myself toward -- but I can honestly say my writing isn't real great at the moment, so I've laid off that. I've been walking quite a bit too, because that's like the only thing my doctor ok'd.* Oh, my favorite is walking while talking to myself. 

I have nothing good to contribute to society at the moment.

* which is interesting, because she wants to do an MRI on my lumbar spine to check on that disc herniation, which shoots a nifty pain down my right leg, but I've been like, "nah, let's lay off putting me through shit for a few weeks, please."